Student Work 11-12
Little Red Riding Hood writing Click to read sentences
Fleshed out sentences Click to read sentences
Snowy Day descriptions Click to view powerpoint
A Day at the Beach paragraphs Click to view powerpoint
Little Red Riding Hood writing
Students are working hard to improve their writing- we are calling it 'spicy writing'!
We read the classic "Little Red Riding Hood" in class, and students inserted their own elaboration at points in the story. Here are their results:
As Little Red Riding Hood left for Grandmother's house, she traveled through the forest:
In the big yellow basket… was beef soup, hot tea, orange juice, and salted crackers. (Precious)
It was the skeleton forest of death, and she was terrified out of her mind. (Charles)
In the basket, Red had crackling corn and sizzling cornbread. The sun was shining like gold. (Alisha)
The weather was lovely, and she was glad. (Ruby)
As she was walking through the forest, the woods got darker and deeper. Every time Red turned around to see what the noise was, some of her food would disappear. (Gabriela)
The clouds are white and puffy. (Kohl)
In Red’s basket she carried red velvet cupcakes with white icing and sprinkles on them. (Jalauna)
In the death forest, the weather was nasty: noisy and pitch black. (Brianna)
The trees were tremendously tall, and the brindled leaves were falling. (Nelson)
Red skipped happily to her grandmother’s house, with a basket full of apples, sandwiches, cookies and juice on a nice, sunny day. (Andrea)
As she walked in the forest, the food started to get warm. (Devin)
Red had a tasty aroma in the air from her basket. (Jazmyn)
She skipped through the lovely flowered forest… (Jennifer)
Red was so excited to visit her poor old grandmother. (Ricardo)
She came across a woodsman in the forest:
The woodsman was chopping down a russet brown tree. He was tall and hairy with smoky black hair. (Precious)
The woodsman had a long matted beard so long you could wrap it around your neck like a scarf. (Luna)
When Red asked which way was north, he just pointed and didn’t say a word. (Gabriela)
The bony, rough, short haired woodsman claimed that Little Red was the most precious little girl in the universe. But all he wanted was a cupcake. (Jalauna)
Red threw a cookie to the woodsman and he caught it in his mouth. (Iyana)
Red became frightened so she dashed away so quickly to the other side of the forest that the huge woodsman said, “Who’s there? Come back,” but found her hiding behind a gigantic tree. (Jana)
The woodsman was concerned, telling Red to watch out for the big, bad wolf. (Taylor)
Little Red Riding Hood arrived at Grandmother's cottage, only to wonder if something was amiss:
In the bed, there was a wad of fur. (Luna)
Red feels uncomfortable with how her grandmother looks, compared to other times she’s seen her. (Alisha)
The cottage was a mess, and Red was shocked. (Elijah)
Red was pounding the door heavily. (Nelson)
The wolf was ten feet tall with sharp teeth and eyes so red. (Elizabeth)
Red saw enormous, razor-sharp teeth and claws, and she was frozen in fear. (Charles)
The wolf had hairy paws, sharp teeth and claws, and ears the size of bunnies. (Alisha)
The wolf was gray, and looked ridiculous in the nightgown. (Angela)
Red dropped the basket, and red velvet colorful sweetness splattered everywhere. (Jalauna)
He was hairy, he was hungry, and he was going to try to eat her. (Brayan)
The wolf wanted to gobble Red and Grandmother together, but a special friend showed up. (Jana)
Red stopped and said, “What did you do with my grandmother?” then began to run again. (Janeica)
The woodsman arrived in time to save Little Red:
The woodsman’s ax was stained with blood. At her feet was the wolf’s head. (Luna)
He chopped the wolf piece by piece, just like he had chopped the tree. (Gabriela)
The wolf’s eyes rolled back in his head, and his fur turned to a blanched color. (Brianna)
The woodsman came just in time, because Red could have been eaten. (Deja)
She ran for a long time, and screamed- that’s what alarmed the woodsman. (Jonathan)
Hood stabbed the wolf in the eye. (Kendall)
She ran to the ground and the wolf chased her. (Giovanni)
The wolf was not alive anymore so they were happy. (Charlea)
There was blood on the floor of Granny’s house. The woodsman had saved Red from getting eaten by the wolf. (Ricardo)
Once the Wolf was dead, Red and the woodsman searched for and found Grandmother:
Red’s Grandmother was sitting on the floor, tied up with tape on her mouth. (Shaly)
Grandmother came out confused and dizzy. But she blubbered that she was happy that someone was there for Little Red. (Jalauna)
She untied her grandmother, and took her inside the house. (Yesenia)
Students used resources (& partners) to create more detailed sentences when given a sample sentence.
The driver honked the horn.
The grumpy old driver honked his horn anxiously to the slow truck driver. (Andrea & Jazmyn)
The young driver anxiously honked the horn at Miles for playing in the street. (Taylor)
The sweaty old driver honked the horn fiercely. (Char’vyz & Charlea)
The reckless driver honked the horn at a riot in the middle of the street. (Nelson & Kendall)
The rowdy driver honked the horn frequently at the children. (Alicia & Janeica)
The stubborn driver anxiously honked the horn. (Yesenia & Deja)
The reckless old man honked his horn frequently and angrily at the traffic jam. (Miles & Jonathan)
The puffy-faced driver honked his horn fiercely for all the drivers to get out of his way. (Isaiah, Elijah, Brittany)
The driver punched the horn as he yelled out the window. (Shaly & Brianna)
The tall, red-faced driver repeatedly honked his horn fiercely at another driver while he passed by. (Iyana & Alisha)
The red-faced driver honked the horn angrily because he was stuck in traffic, late to work. (Gabriela & Shaughnessy)
A boy closed the door.
Robert angrily slammed his bedroom door in his mother’s face because his mother had grounded him. (Shaughnessy & Gabriela)
A mean, mad boy threw the door closed in front of his friends. (Kohl & Charles)
The black-headed boy slammed the brown door shut. (Marcos & Brayan)
The chubby two year old slammed the door, stomped his feet, stuck out his tongue, and slapped his mom. (Iyana & Alisha)
A boy slammed his door as he ran to hide under his bed because he knew he was going to be in trouble. (Brianna & Shaly)
The red-haired boy closed the auburn wooden door in his sister’s face. (Jalauana & Lunamar)
A one year old boy slammed the door so hard that it woke up his parents. (Ruby & Elizabeth)
The rowdy seven year old boy was stomping angrily to his room because he did not get the 3DS. (Miles & Jonathan)
The pimple-faced boy angrily closed the door. (Yesenia & Deja)
A grumpy boy slammed the door on his little sister. (Alicia & Janeica)
The grumpy boy closed his bedroom door on his dad. (Devin & Jennifer)
I sat at my desk.
I sat at my crooked old desk until it fell. (Devin & Jennifer)
I sat at my old rusty desk, waiting for the teacher to give me directions. (Ricardo & Giovanni)
The young girl sat very quietly at her desk, embarrassed. (Alicia & Janeica)
He slouched at his desk, extremely exhausted because he stayed up late. (Miles & Jonathan)
I sat at my auburn desk like a lump. (Oswaldo & Daniel)
I sat at my desk, really, really angry because I did not want to go to school. (Ruby & Elizabeth)
I slammed myself at my desk after the teacher yelled at me. (Brittany, Isaiah, Elijah)
I took a seat in the front of the class because I forgot my glasses in my room. (Jalauna & Lunamar)
I sat there with an attitude, bored out of my mind because my teacher made me sit still at my desk. (Iyana & Alisha)
I sat at my desk, furiously waiting for my parents to come and get me at school for fighting. (Gabriela & Shaughnessy)
Our team won.
Our team, the Cardinals, won the state championship. (Devin & Jennifer)
Our soccer team won five games in a row. (Nelson & Kendall)
Our soccer team won the shiny golden trophy. (Ricardo & Giovanni)
Our team won a basketball championship at the Staples Center in LA on April 21, 2011. (Miles & Jonathan)
Our hard-working team won the finals. (Oswaldo & Daniel)
My team, the Tigers, beat the Wolves in the swimming finals in California. (Jalauna & Lunamar)
Madrid won the Golden Cup against South Africa. (Marcos & Bryan)
I forgot a book.
I got in trouble with Sra. Ballón because I did not get my book from my house, so now I have a detention. (Gabriela & Shaughnessy)
I didn’t remember to bring my book to the library so I got detention. (Kohl & Charles)
I absentmindedly forgot my humungous science book at school. (Iyana & Alisha)
I forgot my Math book at the library last night as I studied for the OAA. (Brianna & Shaly)
I forgot a book I borrowed from a friend, who asked me to return it to the library. (Isaiah, Elijah, Brittany)
I forgot my book at home because I had to rush to the bus stop so I would not be late. (Miles & Jonathan)
I forgot my book report book at school and I need to return it tomorrow! (Ricardo & Giovanni)
I forgot a comic book at the restaurant. (Neslon & Kendall)
We went to lunch.
We went to lunch at a quiet park on the north side. (Taylor)
We went to Sharon Woods to eat lunch at noon. (Oswaldo & Daniel)
The class rushed to the cafeteria because we were late. (Brittany, Isaiah, Elijah)
My grandfather and I went to the fancy new restaurant because I got all A’s on my report card. (Jalauna & Lunamar)
We fiercely bombarded through the halls like a herd of animals to lunch. (Iyana & Alisha)
My mom and I stormed out of school and headed out to the city and bought Chinese food. (Precious & Angela)
We went to Donatos for lunch and got take-out. (Marcos & Brayan)
My pencil needs sharpening.
Abigail got detention for not coming prepared for class with a sharpened pencil. (Shaughnessy & Gabriela)
My plum pencil broke and needed special sharpening. (Precious & Angela)
My pencil needs sharpening before the test. (Brianna & Shaly)
My long-lasting Elmo pencil needs to be shaved I can write with some lead. (Jalauna & Lunamar)
My Justin Beiber pencil needs sharpening but not a lot; that way I can still see his face. (Ruby & Elizabeth)
“My pencil needs sharpening,” I said as I was walking to class. (Nelson & Kendall)
The paper was written.
The spicy paragraph was finally written for the book report due the next day. (Taylor)
The paper was written with a bunch of confidence. (Alicia & Janeica)
The paper was written in red ink by Elizabeth. (Ruby & Elizabeth)
The paper was written about the life cycle of lizards. (Isaiah, Brittany, Elijah)
I have homework.
I have to finish my science inquiry project for homework. (Brianna & Shaly)
I have a three-hundred word essay for homework. (Oswaldo & Daniel)
I have math homework that is very difficult, so I will have to ask questions before I leave. (Taylor)
The day was warm.
The day was so hot, you could fry an egg on the sidewalk. (Brianna & Shaly)
The day was hot enough to cook bacon and eggs on the hood of our Chevy. (Jalauna & Lunamar)
The day was blistering hot. (Miles & Jonathan)
The day was awfully humid. (Ricardo & Giovanni)
The day was flaming warm, and we got a lemon-gold sunburn. (Andrea & Jazmyn)